Cat owner pays partner to look after their home and pet, return to find a complete mess: 'Bed not made, bathroom looking nasty'

Author image for JR Atkinson
JR Atkinson • Writer and Editor
Dec 2, 2024 6:00 PM EST

This time of year, many folks are looking for a house sitter. You may be gone for the holidays and need someone to check your mail, water your plants, and most importantly, take care of your pets. Ideally, in these situations, you want someone you can trust. You want to make sure they will fulfill the tasks they've been asked to, and be respectful doing so. You don't want anyone who is liable to throw a party in your empty pad, eat all your cereal, or even just forget to blow out the candles. Your home is your sanctuary, and you don't want anyone coming along and jeopardizing that, let alone someone you're close to. It could irreparably damage your relationship. 

But that's what happened in this story, when someone left their partner in charge of their house and cat, and things went wrong. Read on for the story and see what you think. 

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    Cheezburger Image 10436179968
    via Unsplash+ (Getty Images)

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story

  • 02
    AITA for yelling at my partner because I paid them to take care of my cat and house and instead they made a mess?
    via u/X88B8-win
  • 03
    I paid my partner to look after my cat and take care of my place while I was away for thanksgiving. I would have paid a cat sitter, but they needed the money, so I figured I would let them stay at mine and pay them instead. I left my place pretty clean. When I came home, everything was just all f ed up. Clothes thrown everywhere, cables from my work desk unplugged and moved, furniture moved, bed not made, bathroom looking nasty. Not exactly "looking after the place", more like just living in the
    via u/X88B8-win
  • 04
    But what p ed me off the most? The cat litter wasn't scooped at all. My cat. had just been peeing and on top of the old waste for what looked like the entire 5 days.
    via u/X88B8-win
  • 05
    Initially, I tried to hold it together and not make a scene because my roommate was home and I didn't want to cause a scene. But I just couldn't hold it together anymore. I yelled at her and told her it's just downright disrespectful and to do. To me & to the cat. I feel like the a h le because she started crying, but I feel like I'm right to be upset? Maybe just the way I delivered it & didn't hold it. together was the a h le move. Idk. I'm posed off.
    via u/X88B8-win
  • 06
    RavenRaving • 12h ago NTA. Imagine living with someone who treats a home like that when they have accepted payment for caring for it. Imagine living with someone who is cruel enough to not scoop a cat box for 5 days. Wow. Is this what you want to sign. up for in a long-term relationship?
    via u/RavenRaving
  • 07
    X88B8-win OP • 11h ago • I got together with them when I was 19 and am now 23. It's the only long term relationship I've been in. But maybe I need to see things for what they are and move on. The litterbox is an automatic one that should cycle, so maybe they just didn't realize? But it's not that hard to see, unplug, replug & press cycle. Especially because I asked them to look after the cat. idk. it's f ed up.
    via u/X88B8-win
  • 08
    gordonf23 12h ago • • NTA. You paid her to take care of the place and take care of the cat. She did the exact oppposite of that. You had every right to be angry and to let her know that she f ed up and really let you down.
    via u/gordonf23
  • 09
    • newlyestablished 12h ago. NTA. Sure, your delivery could've been better, but for all intents and purposes, you were paying money in exhxhange for a service that you didn't receive. You're especially NTA because you didn't specifically need this person to do it. You were letting them do it as a favor since they needed the cash when, in reality, your pet would've been in better hands with someone else.
    via u/newlyestablished
  • 10
    ArtShapiro 12h ago • . ΝΤΑ Your cat is far, far more important than someone's emotional reaction to being correctly called out. I would have been absolutely livid.
    via u/ArtShapiro
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    • Squinky75 12h ago • What did your roommate think about having to live with this mess?
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    • wendyxqm 11h ago The fact you had to PAY your partner to do something that anyone in a healthy relationship would do as being part of a team is the first red flag. I think I wouldn't worry about the mess, instead I'd reassess.
    via u/wendyxqm
  • 13
    SliceEquivalent825 • 12h ago. NTA Was she raised in a barn, she doesn't sound like partner material. It was a simple job, for which she was getting paid. She is untrustworthy, tears do not change that. Later babe
    via u/SliceEquivalent825
  • 14
    lazydaycats 12h ago. NTA. The repercussions of a cat being forced to use such a dirty litterbox could have resulted in your cat going elsewhere throughout your home. Your partner was totally disrespectful of your home and pet. Since money was involved this was a job that didn't even come close to meeting expectations. You have every right to be mad and going forward you know more about your partner than before. What you do with this knowledge is up to you.
    via u/lazydaycats
  • 15
    pixie-ann • 12h ago NTA did she have an excuse for not doing the job she was paid to do? Any excuse would be inadequate but I'm curious to know what she came up with. I hope you didn't pay her. Your poor cat! You're lucky it didn't start going to the toilet in other places with such a dirty litter tray.
    via u/pixie-ann
  • 16
    Any-Clue4308 12h ago. • You have a roommate and paid someone to stay in the apartment, instead of hiring someone to check on the cat and tend to it? I'd be ped off if my roommate left but had someone live there while they were gone.
    via u/Any-Clue4308
  • 17
    Far-Artichoke5849 12h ago • Even if they're a slovenly a hle, and they are, why the h I did they remove cables from the work desk and move furniture?
    via u/Far-Artichoke5849
  • 18
    • Whorible_wife69 11h ago • You had to pay your partner of 4 years to watch your apartment and cat? I could understand if they were traveling to your place on a daily basis to do so but it reads as if they moved into your apartment for 5 days and trashed it. I think you kinda saw what living with them will look like and if you don't run you are choosing this life.
    via u/Whorible_wife69
  • 19
    Baaastet 11h ago • Honestly someone who doesn't - take care of my cat would mean the end of the relationship to me. There is something wrong with people like that
    via u/Baaastet
  • 20
    PJsAreComfy 8h ago. I'm still hung up on your "partner" of four years getting paid to take care of your cat. (The fact that she didn't even do it is just the cherry atop the sh sundae.) I'd do it for free for any of my friends or neighbors, and especially my partner's pets. If after all this time you're not collaborating as a team, wanting to help each other when you can, then I'd question what exactly the relationship is. I'm curious what her explanation was.
    via u/PJsAreComfy
  • 21
    Ashamed_File6955 11h ago. • NTA. If they trashed your place and didn't clean the litter box, there's a good chance they didn't feed/water the cat as instructed either. If it was me and mine, that would be an ex; I have zero time or patience for anyone that can't do the bare minimum for an animal in their care.
    via u/Ashamed_File6955
  • 22
    Travelgrrl 12h ago • I didn't even get past the part about paying your partner to do such a small favor for you. NTA and DTMFA.
    via u/Travelgrrl
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    PurelyPanic14 11h ago. • Obviously I can't say for sure but the crying seems like a guilt tactic. Especially if it was in the sense of 'forget about your issue and comfort me instead' did she even apologise? What does the roommate think about the mess? Is your partner usually that messy/disrespectful to your space and/or belongings? You are absolutely not the a h le. You paid for a cat sitter, not a neglectful mess maker.
    via u/PurelyPanic14

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long term relationship relationship advice healthy marriage aita relationship relationship status house house sitter relationship-drama reddit story relationships cat owners story reddit thread Reddit Cats healthy relationship
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